Tourism is Tough

So I haven't mentioned that much regarding money here but Lindsay and I have been fairly lucky. Everything here is cheap. Lunch and dinner are provided for us at the clinic and our daily ice cream costs about 40 cents. We can spend an hour at the internet cafe for 25 cents.

Yesterday we had a day off and decided to head to Bohol for the day. Bohol is a neighboring island that is very touristy. It boasts white sand beaches, beautiful rolling "chocolate hills," and the worlds smallest monkey: the tarsier. We quickly found out that being a tourist here has a lot of frustrating hidden fees. Let me explain.

We got to the ferry terminal two hours early (6:30 am) to find out that they only had "first class" tickets available. This cost us an extra 400 pesos. We had no choice but to pay. We were not sure what first class would entail only to find out it meant we got saltine crackers and orange "juice" (sugar and orange dye). Feeling ripped off, we got off the boat in Bohol and were immediately surrounded by beggars in boats. They had naked babies riding on their boats and approached the dock asking for money and food. This is nothing new for us so we moved along.

We were planning on seeing some of the inland tourist spots on the island (monkey and the hills) and inquired with the woman from the beach resort about a tour. She directed us toward her tricycle riding "friends" and they began naming prices. A tricycle here is a motorcycle with a two person attached sidecar. We decided this was the best deal and hopped in his trike.

Our drivers name was Glen and he insisted that we pay him 1500 pesos for the whole day (30$). We started off on our drive up to the Chocolate Hills. It was a windy drive and we got to see a lot of Bohol. It is a very rural island where houses are more spread apart and the poverty and pollution doesn't seem to overtake every corner. People move much slower and cows, goats and dogs roam all the streets. Their wasn't quite as much honking and traffic was manageable.

As we put putted up the hills we chatted with Glen a little but mostly just looked at the sights. We also both noticed that Glen had an undeniable cough, accompanied with sniffles and a seemingly sore throat. Here in the Philippines when we hear these kind of symptoms we think TB rather than the Flu. We kept our distance and applied multiple layers of purell.

Our first stop on the tour was the "home" of the Tarsier monkeys; the world's smallest monkeys. We arrived at their safe home to find it wasn't so natural after all. People gather around a cage where three of four monkeys lived and clung to their trees with eyes of fear. We were able to "feed" them monkeys with a stick for a small donation and take pictures. The signs say no touching but children are constantly crowding and touching the poor little rat monkeys.

Next we moved into a little trail that had monkeys somewhat hidden in the trees. We also saw a few sloths and some bigger monkeys: all caged. After 15 minutes, Lindsay and I felt more sad about the state of the monkeys than excited to see a natural wonder. We told Glen to move us on to the chocolate hills and he obliged.

The Chocolate Hills are a large grouping (1200) of very soft rounded hills. They look very bizarre as if they were sanded down to appear so smooth. When we arrived (after paying yet another fee) at the viewing area it began to rain and we quickly climbed up about six flights of stairs to reach the top for a birds eye view of all the hills. It really was a spectacular sight and I was bummed that my camera died right as we reached the top! We were able to take some pictures on Lindsay's camera of us "licking" the chocolate hills.

As we walked back down we told Glen we wanted to buy some postcards but he insisted we needed to get back on the road right away. We weren't totally sure why but figured we could find postcards elsewhere. About 20 minutes into our descent, a fellow driver flags Glen down and tells him that the police are staked out down below ready to give out penalties to unlicensed vehicles going up to the Chocolate Hills. Apparently Glen's tricycle fell under that unauthorized category. Lindsay and I were a bit confused and concerned and kept asking him if everything was ok. He said yes and our pace down the hills slowed down drastically. Finally we reached a spot where a group of white tourists had rented motorcycles and we stopped to relax (aka kill time until the cops left). Glen must have assumed being around white people made us feel a little safe. After about 10 minutes one of his friend drove by and told him the cops were gone. We hopped in the trike and whizzed down the hills.

Our next stop was the Bohol Beach Club for lunch and swimming. The Bohol Beach Club has a very inexpensive entrance fee and a cheap lunch to go along with it. Starving, Lindsay and I beelined for the restaurant and had rice, veggies, chicken and fish. Glen asked for 100 peso advance and got some fish as we swam. The beach was very beautiful white sand and turquoise water. We looked for fish but mostly found a few starfish and a plethora of beautiful coral.

After swimming for awhile we were on a quest for towels. Most of the lifeguards told us towels were not available to day visitors. We decided to dry off in the sun until it started to pour rain at which point we ran to the front lobby soaking wet in our swimsuits and begged for towels. For 30 pesos we were able to "rent" a towel for ten mins.

Next we met back up with Glen and headed back to the ferry. On the way back we started inquiring about his cough and cold but couldn't get very many answers out of him. He told us his cough was due to the rain. When we got to the ferry we paid Glen our overcharged 1500 pesos and got ready to board the ferry. Before entering the ferry we had to pay yet another fee in addition to our ferry fee. Running out of money, soaking wet and tired we were ready to go home.

The waiting area for the ferry also doubles as a concert hall for aspiring musicians. We listened to two guys in Hawaiian shirts and sunglasses (indoors and at night) playing guitars and singing a mixture of gospel music and US oldies. We couldn't understand anything that came over the loudspeaker and were lucky to figure out what time and where our ferry boarded.

Based on my ferry experiences in Europe and North Africa, I am very skeptical of the reliability of any foreign ferries. The rain storm on Bohol made me even more nervous but surprisingly the ferry ride was smooth and relaxing. Once we arrived back in Cebu the cab multiple cab drivers tried to rip us off before finally insisting to one of them that we knew what we were doing and he couldn't rip us off.

We got home at about 9 pm after leaving the house 15 hours earlier. For the first time I really felt like the clinic and all the midwives and guards were my home. I felt so relieved to be back and showered, watched a movie and waited for the woman in the clinic to deliver (more on that later). While being a tourist is fun it is also extremely frustrating when you know enough to know how much you are getting scammed. All we needed was a Filippino friend to help us get around and lay down the law on the scammers.

Tomorrow Lindsay and I depart for Club Serena for three days. We are very happy to have chosen a place where all the fees are set and the owners know and love Hilary and David!